5 steps to master your ego

Lelia Koena
4 min readJan 19, 2021

There is an annoying tendency these days to describe the ego as the bane that must be brought down at all costs in order to live in peace. As if our inner peace is based on killing a part of us: the ego.

In fact, you shouldn’t try to get rid of it. You have to be successful in mastering your ego, not getting rid of it. Because the goal isn’t to get rid of it or live with it by doing it war every day! But rather learn to live with it and to master it.

Mastering your ego can be done through the following 5 steps.

1. Recognize it

The first step in successfully mastering your ego is to recognize it. When I say “recognize” I mean being able to identify it when he comes in your head.

It’s being able to take enough distance from it in order to be able to distinguish when he is speaking or acting for you. Recognizing your ego also means taking the time to analyze your thoughts to see if they come from an emotion of fear (associated with ego) or joy (associated with your soul).

If the emotion associated with your thoughts is fear, or any resulting emotion like worry, anxiety, uncertainty, etc., then there is a very good chance that it is your ego that is causing them. produce. On the contrary, if the emotion associated with your thoughts is joy, or any other emotion that comes from it like excitement, peace, serenity, love, etc., then it is the voice of your soul that speaks to you through your intuition.

Having this simple distinction in mind allows you to recognize when your ego reemerges.

2. Detach from it

After recognizing your ego, I invite you to do some work to detach yourself from it and realize that you are not your ego.

Your true essence is your soul and not your spirit. If you don’t understand what I’m talking about, you can take a look at the article “the triangle of being” which describes the 3 entities of your being.

To help you take a step back from your ego, I advise you to personalize it today: give it a name! By doing this, you will create distance from it and be better able to apply the next steps.

3. Chat with it

The 3rd step in mastering your ego is to start a dialogue with your ego when you see it is taking control of your thoughts. When this happens, start chatting with it by talking to it using his name.

But when you start this dialogue with your ego, there is one important thing to always do: thank it and recognize its usefulness. Indeeds, the ego is useful. It allows you to individualize yourself within a whole. It is at the origin of the “I”.

Talking with your ego can be done in your head as well as orally! Well, of course you won’t do it orally if you are in the street or around a group because it can seem weird but at least do it in your head. Don’t hesitate to ask it questions, ask it why s.he thinks like that, and show it other ways to operate, and reassure it that you know what you want if your intuition tells you a direction opposite to that of your ego.

All this dialogue allows you to really deepen your limiting thought patterns to deconstruct them little by little and succeed in reconnecting with your soul while making room for the ego.

4. Accept it

Accepting your ego is accepting that it will always be present in you and in your life. Because it’s part of your mind. It is an outgrowth of your mind made up of mental energy and thoughts that determines your individuality: your beliefs and everything behind an “I”. It is therefore impossible, even dangerous, to try to get rid of it.

Accepting it comes down to welcoming each of its interventions in your life. It is thanking it for existing knowing that you have the strength and ability to move beyond the ego to hear what your soul is telling you.

The idea is to really learn to work with your ego, to give it its rightful place and to be at peace with it.

In fact, the best you can do to gain control of your ego is to awaken it …

5. Awaken it

Mastering your ego ultimately means being able to live with an awakened ego.

But how do you awaken your ego?

Awakening your ego is helping it to learn to work with you.
It teaches it that he is not the master of your mind but simply a “roommate” or “partner” (as you prefer). It is giving it kindness so that he wants to be sufficiently attentive to the inner voice of your soul: your intuition. As you love it and accept it, the awakening will gradually take place and it will naturally diminish to give space to your intuition.

Awakening it is also teaching it to detach itself from material symbols in order to simply play its initial role: to serve as a landmark of individuality in the whole universe.

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Lelia Koena
Lelia Koena

Written by Lelia Koena

Lélia, passionnée par la vie et amoureuse de la nature qui rêve d’un monde équilibré et libre. Fondatrice de Koena. https://iamkoena.com

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